So, this evening I’m about to launch an all-out assault on the last 20 lbs of fat around my waist and my body. I’ve got until June 9th to get to my goal weight and I hope that if you want to get in shape and drop some great weight over the next three months, you’ll join me.
For those of you about to start a weight loss journey (or are currently on one) I salute you. It’s not for sissies, that’s for sure, especially when those sharp-edged “compliments” start coming your way.
Women losing weight will inevitably come across some comments from people who mean well -or SEEM to, anyway- that are sometimes hurtful and can be delaying/frustrating if you let them. Here are the top five comments that I’ve gotten over the past year and things I’ve actually said in answering them (true story). Take the high road or the low road, your choice:
“But you have such a pretty face.” – It’s actually one of the meanest things you can say because the rest of the unstated sentence is “despite the rest of you.”
- High road – “Thanks. I think the rest of me is pretty smokin’, too.”
- Low road – “I know! It’s amazing how easy I have it,without all the Botox and stuff. How do you handle the needles, Carol?”
“Don’t get TOO skinny.” – Clearly this little dig is issued by people who want you to remain in their own little comfort zone of you being heavier than them. Rarely is this ever issued as a genuine concern for an eating disorder.
- High road – “I’m eating plenty, but thanks for your concern.”
- Low road – “Aw, that’s sweet. Don’t worry, I don’t think your boyfriend/husband is hot at all.”
“I thought you looked great before.” – This might just be a lack of tact, but sometimes it’s not. Take the high road if you really think she’s being nice, but if there’s a hint of side eye on this one, shut it down fast.
- High road -“Your support has always been so amazing. Thanks so much and I hope you’ll continue to be there for me as I lose the weight.”
- Low road -“OMG, we should go get makeovers together! I know a great waxer/hairdresser that can literally make you look SO MUCH BETTER. Want me to book you an appointment, like, SOON? I just need a blowout or a mani.”
“I could never imagine being that heavy.” – I think people say this because they want to bandwagon on a weight loss achievement, but it’s NOT NICE.
- High road – “Most people can’t until you’re there. Luckily, I’m happy and healthy and I feel really good!”
- Low road – “I know. I feel the same way about people who have a narcissistic, unhealthy obsession with being model skinny or gaining any weight at all.”
“We should order the fried stuff AND a whole round of desserts. You’re working out so much, you can TOTALLY burn the calories later. C’mon, you deserve it!” – I’m going to become really unpopular for pointing this out, but this is someone’s way of sabotaging your efforts whether they know it or not. Supportive friends let you order what you want and are happy to just hang with you.
- High road – “You go ahead. I’m good with my order.”
- Low road – “No, it’s okay. The carcinogens in processed and fried food actually make you look dehydrated and contribute to premature wrinkles and skin issues. But you go ahead and dive in. Did you want to borrow some concealer, by the way?”
At the end of the day, it’s all about how you feel about yourself so if none of these little suggestions help, here’s a last one: just smile. At the end of the day, it’s all about you and your journey to your healthy body, so who cares what other people are saying? Carry on!