Get Inspired/ Personal Best
Kristin Booker • November 18, 2013

Monday Motivation: Comparing Yourself To Others

Photo: giafrese

Photo: giafrese

I’ve heard it said that comparison to others is like an act of violence against the self. It’s something with which I sometimes struggle, something that makes it hard for me to feel safe expressing myself.

I think many can relate.

This past weekend, I was having a great time and things were going really well. Like, too well. If you’re like me, every once in a while you can’t just leave well enough alone, especially if you’ve been through tough times. You’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You want to pick at something, which means you go looking for something to be wrong. That’s exactly what I did. I mean, let’s be real: as much as I like to project positivity, I’m human and sometimes I do what everyone else does, which is look over the fence to see what someone else is doing. It you just get inspired to do better, that’s fine. But, when you starting thinking about what you’re doing (or not doing) and what you have (or don’t have) or need to get for yourself (or get rid of immediately,) that’s when it becomes counterproductive.

We all know there are moments where you can be inspired by the fortunes of others, but there’s just a tiny step further in any direction where suddenly your own reflection can turn into a room filled with funhouse mirrors, distorting reality and making everything seem horribly wrong and upside down.

If you’re looking for something to reinforce an opinion you have of yourself, you’ll always find exactly what you’re looking for – good or bad.

I was able to snap out of my wicked little comparison loop, but I’m calling myself out on my own behavior. This weekend was a great reminder to remain focused – and grateful – on what I have. I need a reminder to remain dedicated to being the best I can be, the most motivated to achieve the dreams and goals I’ve set for myself.

And then I thought, you know, I haven’t thought about those dreams in a while. Which is what drove me to look across the proverbial fence. I just got distracted and took my eyes off my own prize. Sometimes, when you’re crazy busy, that’s just what happens, especially if you’re tired…which I am.

When we’re focused deeply on living our own happiness, our own best life, we don’t have time for deep comparison to others. So, here I am, refocused on what makes me happy, what satisfies my needs. That little bout of crazy time reminded me that I need to stay tuned into my own joy, to carve my own path, which may take notes of inspiration from others but, if I’m doing it right, looks nothing like anyone else’s path to happiness.

It’s hard to run forward when you’re looking back or elsewhere. It’s usually when you trip. But I’m back up again, ready to stay focused on living my own best life. Life is short…and I want to live it well…my way.

Today is a beautiful day. Let’s start again fresh and make it ours in our own unique way. Happy Monday.

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