Before I get into some more personal items, let me go ahead and give the count for the weight loss results.
Results: 2 lbs lost
Total lbs lost: 10 lbs
Total dress sizes lost: 1 (size 10 to a size 8)
- I’m going to be very, very honest here: it was nearly impossible to follow this diet during New York Fashion Week. The rigors of having to carry camera equipment and racing across town didn’t make it conducive to following the plan. So, what I effectively did was audit the plan as much as possible. I’m actually repeating week five at the end strictly to see what it’s truly meant to do.
- What DID work for me this week were the breakfast (Meal 1) and dinner (meal four) options. I also followed the snack guidelines very closely. I did crack and have a small skim latte at Starbucks at one point because I was stressed and I am human, after all.
- Flaxseed oil is much better in lemon water than actual ground flaxseed. Although, honestly, I’m used to just slamming the whole thing down in one shot now. I will advise that you’ll want to drink it hot, not cold.
- This was the first week where I caught myself wanting the diet to just be over. Six weeks is not a long time to change your life, but it is when you’re racing around with smoothies in your bag and all you want to do is drop in some place and have fries. But then you realize what’s at stake (health, that seriously fabulous tiny dress you want to wear) and you just suck it up.
But what I really wanted to talk about this week was the brain games that you start to play with yourself when you really lose weight. As I was looking at recent photos of myself, I started to think about the reasons I put the weight on to begin with and what would happen when it came off. Because here I am now, within 17 lbs of my absolute weight goal, and then the train of thought started with this: what happens next?
I’m bringing this up because the reason most diets and diet plans don’t work, in my humble opinion, is that it can fix what’s going into our mouths but not necessarily what’s happening between our ears. My reason for gaining the weight was a depressive state after a nervous breakdown, a state of such magnitude that it effectively caused me to become a shut-in for almost a year. I gained almost 100 lbs in that time and I was a miserable, very sad person.
As I looked at my stomach in the mirror now, the last vestiges of that journey back to myself, I have realized that this last 17 lbs is actually the first weight I put on seven years ago. I’m squarely looking at all that unhappiness right in the face…and I have to figure out how it’s not going to beat me again.
The reasons we all get into these horrid situations, where we find ourselves so far outside where we truly wished to be for whatever reason, those reasons have to be dealt with before the diet and exercise programs can really stick and for the changes to take place. I can honestly say that, staring at my stomach this time, I don’t want those old habits back. Diving into a pot pie face first isn’t going to make anything better. Cupcakes are awesome, but you don’t need six of them. The siren song of bottles of wine isn’t going to bring him back. There’s no magic, no miracles to be found at the bottom of that glass.
And so, before I let go of the last 17 lbs, I have decided to let go of all of those painful bits, the things that were so hard to swallow I had to coat them with hundreds of calories to make them palatable. This last 17 lbs will come off and stay off now because I no longer want their burden, or the burden of all of the pain and heartache I choked down with it.
It means that when this diet is over, I’ll not only be physically free, I really do believe that the emotional weight will be gone as well.
And that, friends, is the best diet plan I’ve ever been on, in my opinion.
I will be free.